Bonjour Cher Anne,
First, thank you for being a mentor-in-absentia for some years now.
I recently purchased your newest book, and have been reviewing all of them.
Over the summer, I committed to an experiment. My experiment was a dietary protocol that worked for me, the first in decades, despite all prior attempts. I learned a great deal about myself, chemistry, hormones, etc. The primary focus, as it turns out, is quality over quantity. Of course.
What has been at times depressing, was exactly your article’s observation.[She is referring to my recent website posting about being depressed by observing obese people with bad food choices at the supermarket checkout.] My joke was if I’d lost one pound a year for 25 years I’d be close to/at my best weight. Well,
I’ve released 25 pounds and am maintaining it easily, because I’ve been focusing on quality, real food, avoiding things that my system doesn’t prefer, and choosing to prepare fresh food in simple, elegant ways that please me, not the marketing gurus who promote the very issues that plague so many people.
For years I tried to be a supportive information provider for various friends, family, etc., but people don’t really want my answer, they mostly want somemagical result without putting in the effort. I stopped answering questions that hadn’t been asked, stopped feeling rejected trying to help people who preferred complaint over action, and now, I feel light, look slim, my clothes fit, and I’ve been able to streamline my closet along with my fridge.
The obese friends observed, but didn’t ask. The sick ones see me with a new job, having let go four part-time stress jobs, having waited to choose one that fits me, not just pick one from survival.
Isn’t this the ‘mystery’ most everyone is looking for? The fit that makes the match? Well, it takes some preparation, some divesting of old thinking and too much stuff.
And, I made new choices and took risks. As another commenter wrote, less is more, from clothes to skincare to negative input to fear-mongering advertisements.
For the first time in years, I’m comfortable in my own skin, and, while boxed, packaged, preserved and fake food abound, I’d rather be real, eat real, and avoid junk everywhere.
Sincerely,
Judy
Dear Anne,
I wanted to send you an email to tell you about how much your books and writing have changed my life. A few years ago, I was not confident in the way I dressed and ate. I weighed a few more pounds then I was comfortable with. On a fitness message board online, I saw a woman recommending your books, talking about your theory of chicness and your message that merely being skinny is not as important as personal style. I was intrigued and bought all your books immediately. I had read a few other French books on similar topics and none of them compare to your realistic system which can be applied anywhere in the world, including recipes and the 100 tips that could be instituted in my life slowly. They have changed the way I think and feel about a variety of things that bothered me before.
Some examples:
La cuisine — I prepare lots of fresh fruits and vegetables now with every meal. I am not a very successful cook, so I love your advice on microwave cooking and simple recipes. I love your idea of quick meals like frozen green beans and bread in a pinch.
L'amour — contrary to the feminist ideals of looking good which I used to think ("I look good only for me!"), I have found that having men as motivation has given me a lot of encouragement.
Personal style — my favorite thing that I have learned about. I just feel good about knowing what suits me. I am not swayed by other people's opinions and now just feel comfortable being me. I used to want to be 'fashionable', but always felt more comfortable in conservative clothes. I find it very freeing to be able to look at clothes and know what will suit me right away. I have recently had two people tell me that they admired my style, which is something that I never thought would happen before.
Simplicity — not really a topic in your books, but this to me is part of what I have learned. Meals are easy and I know what to prepare that's healthy. I always have a garment and know what to wear in every situation. I feel comfortable saying no and standing up for myself. There is so much else that I have learned but it would take up 5 pages in email!!
Overall, the thing that your books have helped me with is that I just feel more like "me" , as I am not focusing on fashion trends, endlessly dieting, trying to change other people's behavior and so forth. I have been able to implement slow changes realistically that have made me feel happy, healthy and more chic. I am comfortable in my own skin, for the first time in my life. Thank you ever so much!
Chloe in California
Dear Anne,
I am fairly new to your books and blog but have enjoyed reading so far two books and several postings. I love the fact that you understand and can appreciate the French lifestyle while living in Texas. I lived in France in my early twenties and still feel touched by the culture and philosophies while living in the San Francisco-Bay Area.
One of my favorite sayings that my girlfriend's French mother use to tell me when living there was that "She was not rich enough to buy cheap things!" I have saved a lot of money just buying a few things that I really love because I really wanted them. Usually they were not on sale. Although it is always nice if there is a discount.
One of the things that I miss so much from living in the South of France is the wonderful lotions with the main ingredient being olive oil. Although we do have access to a few French lotions here, it is still hard to find the ones that have olive oil in it. I just recently got the bright idea of going to Trader Joe's and purchasing their lavender lotion. I then removed a third of the lotion from the bottle and filled it with extra virgin olive oil. A few shakes and I felt like I was back in Provence again. One of Jeanne Calment's secrets to beautiful skin at 122 years of age was olive oil.
I also loved reading about Calment's one kilo a week addiction to chocolate. No wonder she lived so long with the two main ingredients of her diet being olive oil and chocolate which are filled with tons of anti-oxidants.
I find it humorous that Americans are baffled that a women that smoked all her life could live so long. What is rarely clear to Americans is that French people have a lot more discipline than Americans do. It is quite common that the French only smoke a few cigarettes a day. We only think of there being smokers and non-smokers. In Jeanne's case she smoked two cigarettes a day which is less offensive than taking a daily jog through Los Angeles.
Keep up the great work and thank you!
Renee
Bonjour, Anne!
I have enjoyed several of your books, and am slowly (it takes me a while! :-) ) trying to put some of your great ideas into practice. I am working on trying to buy only organic and healthy, local harvest foods, and buying only what we need for about 2 days at the time, and cleaning out my closet as I lose weight so that my wardrobe is elegant and workable.
So my question is this:
How do French women schedule everything that they have to get done-especially house cleaning chores?
I work full time outside my home, and by the time I get off work, do the errands necessary for that day, cook dinner, eat, and then am usually too tired to clean up the kitchen that night, have to go to bed to be able to get up the next morning to get to work. The weekends are busy doing things with family and friends and church, so there is very little time to get chores done. I love and want a very clean home- so when can the chores get done? Do French women have a good answer for this dilemma?
Thanks so much,
Lesa in Alaska
Anne Comments: Thanks so much for writing. I am so happy to hear that you are making progress on your Chic & Slim lifestyle with the improved eating and the wardrobe organizing.
You asked: How do French women schedule everything that they have to get done-especially house cleaning chores?
If you have the original Chic & Slim and Chic & Slim Encore, reread the fifth chapters on Shopping & Deco. I answer that question in those chapters.
Additionally, keep in mind that, in France, by law the full time work week is 35 hours. That gives French women who work full time 5 hours (1 hour per work week day) more free time than American women who work a 40 hour week. The French have more legal holidays than in the USA, and everyone gets 4 weeks paid vacation every year. Some jobs give 6 weeks paid vacation.
French women do not participate in many things that take time for American women such as women's clubs, civic groups, school fund raisers. Church attendance in France now is, for the most part, only by the elderly. There is a government allowance for families with two or more children, and many woman use at least part of this allowance to hire household help. In any case, many French women do not rate a very clean house as highly as many American women.
Living spaces for the French are generally smaller than the large homes and apartments many Americans favor. There is less to clean. Since many live in apartments, French women do not have the gardening chores that many American women have.
So you see that finding time for all your house cleaning chores is more difficult than for the average French woman. Also, my favorite aunt lived more than a decade in Alaska and because of the weather and other factors she found life there more exhausting there than in other states in the USA in which she had lived.
I wish I could give you some easy and quick chic French solution to your problem, but there does not seem to be one. It is just very difficult to work full time and have a very clean home unless you have outside help. Especially if you have other after-work demands on your time.
Regards,
Anne
Hello Anne,
I just finished reading chic&slim Encore, the only book of yours that I have read. I am now going to order all of your other books. I have also read French Women Don't Get Fat and The Fat Fallacy, both of which I found very valuable. However, your book does the best in explaining to American women exactly how and why French women are the way they are. I believe that you are most likely able to do this so well and in such enlightening & thorough detail because you explain it from an American woman's point of view--and I'm sure that the fact you are a Southern women helps this along as well. Yes, I'm from the South (Alabama), am well-traveled both nationally & internationally, and have lived on both coasts (in the states), so this is an informed opinion.
I appreciate your explaining the French woman's falsely-perceived snobbishness by Americans as being actually due to a well-conceived reserve, and ingrained etiquette and use of manners, which has been lost in the most of the United States, and to a lesser extent in the Southern states, but alas is becoming more true there daily.
Thank you for a wonderful book. I look forward to reading all of your other books.
Sincerely, Glenda from Alabama
Anne-
Having been a long time reader of your books and website has given me the knowledge and strength of character to raise my daughter with French values regarding activity (we walk to school every day and on the weekends), clothing, food, friends and things. Though I am still working on achieving a Chic & Slim physique for myself, I find that rereading your books provides a reassurance that I’m on the right track.
Thank you Anne, as always for being the petite voix in the back of my head that encourages me to make Chic & Slim choices everyday for my family.
Ps. I truly love the redesigned website. Très Chic!
Heather in Boston
j'adore le website nouveau
The new website is fantastic.
Rocki
Dear Anne
Your postings on your website have, over the past many years, been a key part of keeping me grounded in what's real and right about life when stresses of my own have tried to overwhelm me.
I love the new website! C'est tres chic!
Best regards,
Laura
Bonjour Anne!
I have been a fan of yours for oh-so-many years now; it's been about 7 years or so since I first discovered your books! You have been so instrumental in keeping me on track but lately I have strayed and of course, I am paying the price!
Needless to say, I am re-reading all your books again to get my head on straight but I thought I would also tell you this little tidbit of my "lightbulb" moment! Last October, I began working part-time as a personal trainer - not terribly chic, but I do enjoy fitness and feel that there is something that everyone can do to keep themselves slim !! In any event, I found myself wearing my workout clothes far too much - the stretchy fabric did not alert me to the expansion areas !!! I recall that you wrote about that once and, lo and behold, it's TRUE -- "real clothes" keep you in check far more accurately than Spandex or even a scale !
Anyway, I AM back on track - not depriving myself, but definitely watching it !! Thank you again for all your work! Merci.
Elizabeth
The next reader shared this detailed critique of Chic & Slim: how those chic French women eat all that rich food and still stay slim
To: Anne Barone
I really enjoyed your book because it seems so practical and so much more enjoyable a lifestyle than other books I've read. I also recall reading French Women Don’t Get Fat but I do not recall thinking it was as enjoyable a read as your book.
Advice on Eating — Basically from your book, I gathered I can eat what I want as a long as it is in a reasonable quantity and it is good quality and I don't have to be a Puritan when it comes to food. That is so much more realistic and joyous than any diet.
Advice on Exercise — Rather than throw myself and my time into rough and sweaty aerobics, taking care of myself moment to moment by wearing form fitting and pretty clothing will save myself from wasting my time and energy and possibly injuring myself.
Advice on Makeup — I really loved your advice on not having to wear foundation and concealer. Being on a tight budget, I realize how potentially expensive and time-consuming buying and trying cosmetics can be. Also in reading some cosmetic and vegetarian books, I realize there has been a history of cruelty to animals in the world of cosmetics. There's nothing more lovely than a clean and clear face and conscience.
Advice on Clothing — Again, similar to above, your advice on clothing was so practical. Since my teens I have spent so much money and time shopping for clothes and if one examined my wardrobe none of those clothes looked good on me, suited my personality or budget (they were overpriced) nor were they comfortable. It is an area of life I really, really regret because I feel I could have either saved my money or donated it to charity or the church. I was so amazed by the French style of having an economical and versatile wardrobe of good quality—I had never heard of this before!
Advice on Lingerie? Perfume? — What you wrote makes sense-if you feel pretty and feminine, you will take better care of yourself. I am sure wearing form- fitting clothes helps one take better care of oneself. But for me, I have never really worn perfume before and I am not a huge fan of fragrance, especially in Canada where people seem to be more conscientious of allergies and environmental concerns.
Advice on Leaving Abusive Relationships — I was surprised and impressed when I came across this in your book because I had never read this before in a beauty book but when I recall the behaviors and physical changes that came about because of stress, it makes total sense. This also protects one’s beauty and dignity on the inside but I have to acknowledge for some people, including myself, it can be a trickier area.
I just wanted to express to you how much I enjoyed reading your book—it had a lot of charm (including the "chicness and slimness" of the book itself) and insight. Plus it wasn't a long and tedious read but filled with practical info. I am sure if I had read your book as a youth, I would have saved myself a lot of money and resulting heartache. I cannot express how charmed I was by the advice in your book but I found it a very lovely read.
Susan in Ontario
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